fighting for oreos.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

My True Life Story
Since young,i was active & tough,especially in sports & asthetics.
well,what can you say when I bit someone's hand when I was in kindergarden.
From kindergarden to primary school,
I didn't have a choice but my grandparents insisted that i go to an all-girls' school.
Morever my relatives,my cousins & my mum were all from the same school.

Marymount Convent,one of he top disciplined school was I in.
we had to behave like "Ladies Of Grace" & of course follow our scholl values,LIGHT.
L-Love,I-Integrity,G-Grace,H-Happiness,T-Trust.
Five values wasn't easy to cope with as it had to be displayed in different ways,
but what was worse was that the dicipline level was high!

Well,skirts were super long,socks were super high,hair were all fringed up & neat,respect was to be given to every single teacher in school,vulgarities were all banned,punctuality was essential,singing of the school song was a must.

That's how i survived for six whole years,not learning any bad stuff,except when I was in primary three to five.
Everything went wrong but I thought it was right.

In primary three,I started lying,cheating on homeworks.
In primary four,I mixed around with the wrong person,
so we,as in me & that person,started skipping lessons,lying,cheating in tests & we strated it with Social Studies.
But all soon went worse when the teacher called my grandmother complaining that I ha skipped her remedial lesson.
In primary five,I was rebellious & refused to do homeworks at certain time,
cutting the leaves from the banana tree,cheating in more tests,failing my first language,English.
But the teachers refused to give up on me & I just totally ignored their advices,
even though they helped me to pass my failing subjects.
In primary six,during the first half of the most important year,I totally did not improve in my studies & slacked alot.
but my teacher really did not give up on me.
She organised tuitions at her home,treated us,guided us & chatted with us.
It was only during the secong half of that important year that I caught up,
learned & studied harder.

During the examinations,my teacher prayed hard.
She knew I was not good in my Mathematics & Mother Tongue.
But she had total faith in me & I was encouraged to do better.
I knew it was all in my hands.

I tried hard,answering every questions that i could & could not.
my hard work was paid off,but i wasn't satisfied with the results.
I went to a corner & cried,but somehow my best friend told my teacher & she came running towards me.
Looking at my results,she exclaimed,"Wow,claudia,I'm so proud of you!You got a B for Math!"
then she hugged me & whispered in my ears,"Don't cry claudia.You are special in my eyes & God is with you always.Be happy for whatever you have."
I continued ignoring & just cry.

Being in a all-girl school for six years of my education makes me feel weird around guys.
but it was so shocking that after getting my PSLE results,I was admitted to Hillgrove Secondary School,my fourth choice.
I appealed for transfer to CHIJ St.Teresa's Convent but it failed.
No choice do I have except to just bear with having guys around.

The first few days in Hillgrove was quite quiet.
well,being in 2A1 was quite fine with me,but it got worse when we sabotaged a guy who was not responsibe,to be the chairman.
It was really bad,when the guys played monkey with our pencil cases & spoiled the windows & doors.

Well,i was the so called "hero",trying to stop & forcing the guys to return the pencil cases.
no choice,i had to suffer the consequences after forcing them.
The teachers didn't helped much,only mdm lee did.
well,i should call her my "Heroine".

Mixing with the wrong people,i was influenced to do the wrong thing,
slashing myself.
Well,to admit,i did have a stead,but we broke up because we agreed that we could not be together,under some circumstances.

At the beginning of this year,I met some nice people.
Practically,they changed my entire life.
If i could,i would thank these people,but even a thousand "thank you" would not express my gratitude towards them.

The slashing stopped,vulgarities almost stopped.
Thoughts of piercing ear,tongue,nose were forced to stop.
i thought i would be happy being with them...
but soon my happiness disappeared...

I was lonely then,since beginning of the year but not so when only one person was with me all the while?
I was backstabbed,insulted,bullied & confused.
I did not know who to trust...
Councillor stuff & duty stresses me up,my brain were dead tired at times.
I lost my temper,got angry easily,i really did not know what to do.

I hated that particular person for doing those to me.
at times i wished i could just kill her.
but well,no,i did not.
accepting it normally,ignoring it like...
Dropping in my studies this year,i became crazy over studying.
staying back everyday to study & to get my position back.

I never knew that that particular friendship was derioting.
but somehow,i felt it.
The bond between us,the promises we made,was all gone into the drain.
I was totally depressed,but suddenly,something made me feel better.
Though everything between us was gone,my studies improved loads.

Many at times,i felt like quitting my position as a councillor.
but someone said that it would be good for JC.
well,maybe im not quitting.
Getting my results back,i was over the moon when i knew i was placed third in class.
I was quite happy but sad as i did not managed to go to express,even though i could.
Somehow,people still say express is harder.

Another happy day on the 4th of november,
was when we knew which class we were going to.
well,i managed to go to the A Math class.
happy but sad,that wong was in the same class too.

Ignored her,i went on.
now in life,i seriously have no fixed mind of my own.
A wave of feelings & emotions am i made up with.
Random eelings & emotions do i have,at different times.

Now i know that no matter what happens,we still have to carry on with our lives.
Regardless of loing your best friend or what,our lives are 10000 times more worth.
Some friends treat you differently,others dont.
but after all,what maters most is the heart.

I have nothing else to say.
Adios' people!

My GREEN Spectacles!!

My Spectacle set[GREEN box,GREEN clothe,GREEN spec]

well,probably im too greeny.
but I LOVE green!it rocks my world!
nvm,tat was random.

anw,today woke up,online-ed.
chatted with peeps,then had a shower,went to get some stuff for ah ma,then met up with a human penguin[the live version].
haha.
got my spectacles & then hopped on train to gombak.
ate bee hoon goreng,then did homework at mac.
was ok lah,but really was quite stupid to forgot my math. -.-

walked to the bus stop as we parted & i waited for the bus.
went back home & online-ed.
well,was actually laughing at
MISS LEO.
lol.
tmr got choir,hope i can remember the score.
I WANNA PLAY PAINTBALL!!
who interested?

~ends~

Labels: story, updates

.i whine today, have u? .

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

I Can Tell The Future
I did not know that since birth I had a gift,
a special gift.
A gift of predicting the future,
dreaming dreams that will come true.

I never expected all this to happen until now.
since young,i was a playful little girl who did not really think & cared about life.
but after two incidents,it changed my mindset forever...

"No,this cant happen.it will not."
i dream...this dream,a weird dream.
my friend,died in a car accident,a bad one.
then she was admitted to the ICU,but left the world a fews hours later,
due to loss of blood.

I thought it was just a normal dream,but it was real,for sure.
it actually happened.
when i read the news,they clearly stated the name & how she died!!
i cried non-stop.
then i remembered the dream,i beat myself up until i was sent for councilling.

It was hell.
no,worser than hell.
they pump you with questions until you break down & cry.
more like interrogations.

After councilling,i went home & just cried in my room.
i asked myself,why must it happen to me.
then i took a blade & started slashing myself.
no hurt,no pain,no gain.

But soon after everything returned to normal,a second incident happened.
this time,i dreamt of school.
a school which is so unfair,so biased,& i get expelled for an argument,
it happened.

I was arguing with a teacher over a mathematics question,
then the principal,by accident,walked passed.
he told me to say sorry and when i told him what happened,he said,
"GET OUT!YOU DONT NEED TO COME TO SCHOOL FROM TOMORROW ONWARDS!"

At that moment,i begged for another chance,
but they did not even care to hear & threw my stuff out.
in fit of anger,i walked out & never went back,despite my friends pleas.

Till now,i'm not so educated,but i managed to write this story for you.
I hope to live a better life,have a better future.
till then.....

went get results.
got into A Mathematics class.
happy but sad cause SHERMANE WONG is also in 3A1.
wth...
went to ings house,slacked but was disrupted but some stuff.
we chatted & laughed alot.
tmr still got band.
very tired le,now so confused.
death or live?

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .

Monday, November 3, 2008

My Special Penguin,Jacky
All the while,penguins were the only things i cared.
my mum,my dad,my sibling,my relatives,
they could not even separate me from my favourite penguin stuff toy.
I treated it like my family,gave food & water,played with it,
but it never once spoke...

On my every birthday,
all i wished was that my penguin who i named Jacky,to speak.
i thought i could live forever with him,
but i was wrong.
World War III came...

"C'mon.leave everything.you're going to the concentration camp."
"My penguin!!No!!i need it!!"
i snatched it away & went.

In the camp,there were thousands of people.
many were frail & sick.
I was among them,sick.
but despite everything,i still held Jacky close.

We slept next to each other,did everything together,cried together,suffered together.
but,even after everything happened,he never said anything,
& the only thing he did was to smile.

One night,whilst huggin Jacky so tightly,
he suddenly seemed sad.
i rubbed my eyes,i thought i was dreaming.
but hey,no,i wasn't.

"I've see you suffering,no,its sad.you cared so much for me,now its my turn.I will save you from all danger." Jacky said.
I thought i saw him crying,but yes,he was,indeed,crying.
i cried,as we hugged each other.
"I will never leave you."

Months passed,years passed,& Jacky was still with me.
He did meant what he said after all.
he protected me from everything,& we survived through hell.
but everything soon ended one day when one of the guards shot him.

"NO!!!JACKY!!!YOU CANT LEAVE ME!!!" but all i saw was,cotton flying in the air.
I looked as my eyes puffed up with tears.
I could not stop crying for days.
My best friend,my family,my brother,is gone....forever...

I did nothing & i wished everyday that i could rot & die faster.
but one night,he appeared & said,"I miss you Joyce,i miss you.but its fate that separated us.do not fret,we'll be together again someday.everything will return to normal after tomorrow."
"After tomorrow?What's going to happen?"
"I will not say.Just wait & see.Goodbye my friend."
"Wait...You havent answered my question.."

And he vanished...
what he said came true.
We were given our freedom after the British dropped the bomb in Germany.
My freedom,is back..
but my memories will never die.

Jacky,my penguin,I will remember you always.

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .

Sunday, November 2, 2008

When I Was..
Since young,I've been looked after by my grandparents.
being a little child,i'm innocent.
a good girl was I & never getting into trouble.
but of recent years,I never knew i was more mischievious...

I used to listen to them when i was young,
they cared for me so much.
When i was 9,
i became a little naughtier.
Even so,they still cared for me.

When i was 12,
i was hot-tempered & though i was naughty,
they still cared for me & kept their peace.

When i was 13,
i mixed with the wrong company,
i became naughtier,
they still cared about me even though i did not.

When i was 14,
i did not even care about them,
but they still did,
giving me everything i wanted.

When i graduated from secondary education,
i did not even talked to them & treated them as "money tree".
whenever i needed money,i find them.when i dont,i dont care at all.
Even that,they still cared for me.

When i was in polytechnic,
i had many friends & i only cared about education & friends.
i neglected them so much that they were hurt,
but they still cared for me.

When i entered university,
i had my own life.
i didnt care about anything else except for my friends,my career,my sweetheart.
they still cared for me.

When i got married,
i invited them,they was happy to see me in white gown.
though everything happened so quickly,
i did not need their care but they still cared for me.

When i was 26 & had a kid,
i told them & they were over the moon.
i didnt really cared,but they still cared.

One day,
when i was working,i received a call that my grandfather fainted.
I rushed to the hospital immediately.
staying at his bedside,i just hope to see him recovered quickly.

As i prayed,he suddenly talked,
"Corrine,do not worry about me.I'm fine.Go back to work.Wait your boss fire you."
"you're more important to me."
he kept quiet.
Then he had a heart attacked,& within minutes,he died.

"NOOO!!!You cant die!!No!dont leave me!!" I cried bitterly.
In the state of shock,my grandmother fainted.
She was admitted,this time,it was worse than getting fired.

I got a few days off & stayed by her side.
Then I told her with tears in my eyes,"I'm sorry ma...Im sorry for ignoring you & grandpa all the while.Im sorry...."
All she said was,"I forgive you." as she closed her eyes forever.....

At that moment,i felt as though my world came shattering down.
No life,no nothing.
even my husband could not calm me down.
I cried for days,neglecting my family,my job,my life.

But one night,
my grandfather appeared to me,he said,"Corrine,stop crying for us!We're in heaven now & seeing you in this state breaks our hearts.Please stop neglectng your family & everything!they need you."
I looked up with my puffy eyes & nodded my head.
He waved goodbye as he said,"Bless you."

Since that day after thar incident,
i remembered them & told my children how great they were.
& my kids enjoyed the story.
I will never forget what had happened & what they had done for me...

yesterday was my last day at cat class.
will miss CON2B forever!!
nvm,still got next year.
anw,i plan to teach catechism after next year comfirmation.

woke up late today & did not go to church.
well,i was tired.
went to do hw with waihian & changed the place many times.
but still managed to do a piece of hw finished.

well,im just gonna write more stories.
i hope you peeps will like it.
give ur comments too!

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .

Saturday, November 1, 2008

My Life Story
"Miss Lim,would you care to share with us your life story,since today our class work is about Life Stories."
"Erm...well...ok...ok,i will."
"Please continue,Miss Lim"

"Well,actually,my life isnt a nice life to live,but i had no choice but to continue living,
it was not for the sake of my friends or family,but since young,
i had a special gift,the gift of kindness & caring,but i must
& also to suffer & realise that everything was a blessing in disguise.

When i was born,my mum left me for another guy.She was 20 then.
she almost threw me from the 3rd storey.
I was lucky that my grandparents,my mum's parents,saved me.
they looked after me since then.

Though we were a poor-middle class family,
we survived the hardships under God's guidiance.
my grandparents even brought me to church when i was 3 years old!!
imagine,a 3 year old girl,goes to church & is amazed by the church mass.

My mum didnt really cared.
she only cared for herself,her friends.
even my birthday since a year old was not celebrated until now!
but i didnt really care,
i did not treat her as my mother.

I was not spoiled by my grandparents,unlike other kids.
I just accepted the way we were & I loved simplicity.
being enrolled in a high class school,
there were low class students too.
that was just my clique.

I was quiet,active & kind when i was in primary school.
as i grew older,i fell onto the wrong path & didnt really found my way back.
I mixed with bad company,skipping every lesson i could skip,defiance & lying.
but when I was in primary 6,
my life changed when my form teacher helped me.

Months before the first major examinations,also known as 'Primary School Leaving Examinations' or 'PSLE',
my teacher pumped us with loads of homework,& I,being the "bad" kind,refused doing them,
but my teacher said something,"Do it,even though you fail,pick yourself up & try again.I have faith in you."

That was like during the june holidays.
after the holidays,we got ourselves prepared for the examinations.
i suddenly realised that it was important & did last minute revision.
The examinations was horrible & i was afraid i would not get into the express stream.

What i said came true.
i did not get into the express stream when we got our results back.
I cried.but somehow,my form teacher comforted me & said that,
i have the potential but do not use it wisely & i was playful.

When i went to scondary1,i tried asking for transfer to a single gender school,
but to no avail.
so i had no other choice except to get used to having guys around.
my first year with the clas was quite playful as i easily topped the class & level.

But when we reached into secondary2,
things became tougher & there was more disciplin enforced.
i dropped in position but i did not really care,
all i cared was to get more friends.
but instead,i made more enemies.

Those enemies are friends who broke friendships & backstabbed me.
though i cant do anything,all i did was to blame God.
I blamed him for every mistake then happened & every problem that occurred.

I was so into computer at that time before the final year examinations,
& it was like in two weeks!!
but everything happened so fast that i lost stuff,broke friendships,got into trouble with the teacher,etc.
it was so depressing,at that time when you are geting ready for your examinations
but everything happened at the wrong time.

But somehow,i realised that it was a blessing in disguise when i got my results back.
I was over the moon!!
i managed to get top three positions.

Well,as for my mum,im still having troubles with her attitude.
though we always argue,i sometimes have to give in.
afterall,she's my mother,but i dont really care.
all i care is for everyone to be happy."

"Wow,Miss Lim,it was a nice story told." Tears filled their eyes,as my students cried.
"Now,it's your turn.Write about your life.I will not read it,no one will,except for you parents.We are going to mail it to them." I said,wiping my tears away.
"Ok kids,get down to work!"

[the story above is a true life story]

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .

Friday, October 31, 2008

His 21st Birthday
When i was young,on my every birthday,i would wish for a brother.
a brother who i would care & love.
when i was 5,my wish came true.
my family had a hard time choosing a name for him,
but in the end,we named him Vincent.

I thought that i could live happily with him forever,
but God reduced his lifespan & our hearts broke when the doctor said he had Alzheimer,
a disease which affects the mental abilities including memory, language, and cognition.

I blamed myself for everything,for not being able to take care of him properly,busying myself with school work,
& he was only 5 when it happened.though that incident struck me badly,
i did not give up hope,but showed him more care then ever.

At the age of 12,he was struck down with kidney cancer.
it was another heart shattering news,as i looked at him struggling for survival.
despite his illness,he continued to be active in school & the teachers loved him.
When he was 16,he was struck with leukaemia,
in which he was forced to stop being active.

That 3 incidents broke my heart badly & i cried out one day,in my room.
I cried out to God,"Why?Why must you do this to him?Why?!"
I didnt know that Vincent came into the room.
Then he told me something which i was shocked to hear,
"Why do you cry for me?If its the Lord's will to take me away,let him.After all,we were,made by him & we shall die by him."
That sentences shocked me & after he left the room,i felt a strong presence calming me down.

When he was 20years 3months old,we brought him for his usual check up & we were shocked to know that he had only 9months to live on.
I scolded God for making his life shorter & i was deeply sad with his life.
From an energetic,hyperactive person to a dying person.

Even though i was sad,i tried to spend my time with him within that 9months.
I told him stories at his bedside in the hospital,i read him stories from the bible.
when i told him about how Jesus died,he screamed,"No!That's not how it should be!No,it's not fair,it's not true!"
Somehow,i calmed him down & eased him.

On the last day of his life,i spent the whole day in the hospital with him,telling him how nice heaven was.
As I told him that,we would be happy if he was happy,he suddenly said,"Angie,that time you told me the story of how Jesus died,that crown,its not a crown of thorns!It's a shining golden crown,the brightest crown i've ever seen."
Looking at the spot where he pointed,i smiled sadly but i knew his time was almost up.

Few minutes before he died,he said this to me,
"Angie my sister,please tell mum & dad that i'm going with that man ober there,tell them not to worry about me.I'll be alright."
I once again looked at the same spot where he pointed & i felt a warm presence in that room.Tears flowed down like a river.

On the last minute,he said,"I'm going now,please tell mum & dad that i will be alright.I love you Angela,I love you my beloved sister.I will miss you...."
His voice trailed off...
I burst out crying,crying for him,grabbing his body,i shouted,"Why?Why must you leave me?!"
Then he suddenly opened his eyes,"Let me go Angie,I must be with my father now."
I let go of him & wept bitterly,i knew he was in heaven.

As the clock stuck 12,i suddenly remembered something.
It was his 21st birthday.

argh...
was late for fall in,& i didnt really care-d cause i wasnt in the mood.
hated it,the drills @#$%.
warmed up,played tribal & i was told that i cannot stretch sideways,but its natural for me.
so i hope i can transfer section.

saw denise by coincidence & she said she was having choir.
so i said,let me go help the Altos'
during 1 of the warm up,i was told not to sing,then i was "did i sing wrongly?".
but,the 2nd instructor said that i sang well & did the correct thing.
everyone looked at me,embarrassed,i looked down.

then durng a 10mins break after singing "Dandansoy",i asked miss Xuan to play for me "Days of Quiet Joy".
so,i sang solo & i sang with confidence.
it was the first time i sang that song,yet,i got the song correct except for 2 parts.
i was so happy with myself.
went home with a headache.

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .

Thursday, October 30, 2008

My Vision
"argh!!ARGHHH!!!
ARGH!!!
NO!DONT DO THIS TO ME!!
ARGH!!!"

no...it cant be happening...
this cant be happening to me...
the voices...i've heard them before..
no.....NO!!!
its not true...it cant be true...

i see...i see a vision...a vision of war & sadness among every land...
no...please tell me its not true...please tell me its not gonna happen...
why...why must it be me..?
why must i know everything before it happens..?
why cant i be a normal human being leading a normal life..?

i see...i see a girl..
a girl running away from the soldiers of death...
running as fast as she could,finding a place to hide...
hide far away from them...
& i see...the girl's face...
it's...it's...it's me...

saying a prayer quietly,she sang hymns in her heart,
hoping that everything would end soon..
as she got up to surrender & die for the Lord,
a bright white figure descended from the sky,the heavens,with angels surronding it...
as it landed,she gave praise to the Almighty one,rejoicing & was glad.

the Lord stopped all the war,the fighting,the bloodshed,the anger,the sorrow,the pain,the sadness.
And He said,"I sent my only son to this world.But even after He died & forgave our sins,you humans did these!How ungrateful can you be!"
then,everyone repented & beat against their breast to show how sorry they were.
but all God said was,"I loves the world so much & I gave my only son.But even after all these happened under the wicked hands of man,I forgive all of you.Go in peace,my child."
they all went in their own directions & praised the Lord.

then,the Lord took the child in his hands,
patted her head,blessed her family with riches & gladness,
took her up into heaven with Him,
and there,she served him happily for eternity.

As i woke up from this weird dream,
i said softly in my heart,"Praise the Lord for he is Good.Amen."

slacked the whole day.
watched Soul Eater again!
nice man,wont get bored of it.but stopped until episode10.

chatted,encouraged someone,etc.
thanks MISS LEO for blog shopping for me.
though i lazy lah,haha.
but Thanks Loads!

just to note:
I'll be typing in my stories,poems,songs I made.
i hope you people enjoy them.
do feel the emotions i tried to expressed,cause I wrote them because i experienced them.
give me your comments on the ste poems,stories,songs!
Thanks!

~ends~

Labels: story

.i whine today, have u? .